Summarize

Perhaps it was a morbid fascination, but I secretly anticipated this bakkie arriving. Suppose like it is with machines set to smash our test records, we were about to drive a bakkie that, well, smashed its own records, for want of a better word.

See this once Dakar-proven Nissan NP300 ‘Hardbody’ is now also famous for all the wrong reasons, thanks to its new zero-star NCAP safety rating. So we were waiting for this NP300 bristling with R25K’s worth of snorkels, side steps, bull bars and a roll-over hoop. Morbid fascination indeed.

Hardbody is old school — slight in comparison to today’s bolder bakkies, it’s not bad looking for a 20-year old pickup. Swing open the door and its pleasant enough with reasonably adjustable seats and some modern touches like that touchscreen infotainment cobbled neatly into the dash. But you can’t hide the 80s bits.

It's jittery on the road; choppy on corrugated surfaces and sings along with five cogs in the box but hits the wall up the rev range. Of course there’s that morbid knowledge of impending death — especially if you’ve seen the NCAP movie. Reality driving, perhaps?

But does it fit the bill? Well this R434K 98kW zero-star Nissan packs a 975kg load and lumbers to 100km in 13.33 seconds. The R380K 88kW JMC Vigus carries 616kg and chugs to 100 in 14.56 seconds and the R280K 105kW GWM Steed 5E carries 675kg, accelerates to 100 in 12.5 seconds. But neither was crash tested. 

R315K GWM Steed 6 and R364K Mahindra Pik Up S10 both have two star crash ratings and far better performance for a lot less money. But then you can also buy a brand-new safe-as-houses Triton for just R70K more, so one has to wonder about Hardbody pricing, tricky bits and all…

Make no mistake — you are taking your life into your own hands in any of the five ‘bargain’ bakkies I mention — or any 10-year or older bakkie, for that matter. They are all death traps, so it kinda makes sense to blow third world money on them. But Hardbody’s biggest problem is more than just safety — it is way overpriced. So why bother risk your life for that money when you can do that for half as much?

QUICK TEST:   Nissan NP300 Hardbody 2.4 DC 4x4

Engine:    98kW 304Nm 2498cc petrol I4

Drive: 5-speed manual 4X4

Payload    975kg

Braked Trailer 1400kg

TESTED: 

0-60km/h 4.97sec

0-100km/h: 13.33 sec   

400m: 18.6 sec @ 118km/h

80-120km/h:          10.93 sec       

CLAIMED:       

Fuel: 8.9 l/100km

CO2: 247 g/km

Warranty/Service 6y 60Kkm/1-5y 30-150Kkm

LIST PRICE: R434K

RATED:          33%